Xmas meal shock exclusive: Harry and Meghan’s secret dinner plans
December 17, 2022, 10:13 pm , by Richard Lutz

Sir Howard Elston, our cuisine writer, reveals the latest menu for THAT big Christmas family dinner prepared by The Duke and Duchess of Netflix
Starters:
Hard cheese
Sour grapes
Cold Windsor soup
Mouche Bouche:
Peppery scrambled Meggs
Terrine of spleen
Mains:
All portions served with a silver spoon
Right royal Family stew
Overcooked paparazzi pasta
Spare heir ribs
Coronation Chicken Catch A Tory
Large beef (about most things)
Sidedishes:
Massive chips on the shoulder
Aubergine, mostly half baked
Over egged pudding dabbed with a minute dab of tabloid source
Dessert:
Teary misu (best with a mouthful of bottled rage)
Absolutely Christmas crackers
Re-hash cookies
A duet of gooseberry fool
Upside Down Kate
Digestif:
Pint of English bitter accompanied by a slice of Randy Andy Candy
Music choices:
London Not Calling
Exile on Main Street
I fought the In-laws and the In-laws Didn’t Win
California Dreaming
Woolly Bully
It’s a Family Affair
What You Need is Brotherly Love
Am I Right Or Am I Meringue
+++ under severe legal advice, Sir Howard Elston begrudgingly acknowledges additional material by TL and RJL
Martin
Does that Christmas menu constitute treason? Highly creative and very good…enjoyed that!
Nick Dent
How much is this set menu? Are there any spare seats or is it all booked up? It all sounds very festive indeed….🎅🎅🎅
Alan Holland
Bare faced beef cheek!
Happy Christmas Richard. Thank you for lightening our year with your insights.
Alan.
Ramesh S
Quite a hoot!
Bella Houston
Oh to be famous
Leoj
Thanks. Now I don’t have to watch the Netflix series
Jess Harris
🤩 Not spent time watching it. Life is too precious!
Frederika (Bruist) Bradbury
Perfect 🤩
…..but any comment on the strikes?😁
Kaye Runcliffe
Smells delicious especially with tabloid source
joe Smith
Aye, very entertaining Richard, well done.
Subscribe to new posts.