Social Media Shocker: Whatsupp on WhatsApp
December 5, 2021, 8:11 am , by Mediaman
SIR HOWARD ELSTON patrols the fulgent world of The Snitterfield Road chat group

Sue Generis: Can anyone help? Going bonkers over selfish car parked cross my drive as below: love yaš©āā¤ļøāš© Suze

Anon: my other half tried a sharp key across the paintwork of a beemer
Greg: Andā¦.?
Anon: sixty hours community service
Margot: Margot Reynolds at 31A here. Iām 78 with that bad hip Iāve incessantly told the whole street about. Can anyone walk my Tush, a Bedlngton Terrier, twice a day?
Jerry14: Are Bedlingtons the ones that look like they got sledge hammered in the face?
Shaila: no, theyāre like little lambie pies. Real QTs
Anon: if youāre blind
Freddie: Back to effinā bloody parking. Got people cross my drive here on lower Snitterfield Rd. See below. Do I call the cops?

Allen: whoooooops, soz, I think the blue oneās mine
Sue Generis: You got nerve. I live up near The Duck Inn and on Fri night, itās murder
(Sue Generis has left the group)
Jay-boy: Whoād ever drink at The Duck?
Ariana: Quackheads?
Green Sally: Iāve just lifted my geraniums. Anyone want āem?
Geoffrey: Gerania
Margot: Still no takers for my Tush???????š¶š¶š¶
Jamie: WOWā¦.errrrrā¦.Pardonā¦..musta misread that.
Alyce: Trade the gerania for my uplifted orlaya, didiscus and scabiosa
Jack T: Is scabiosa a plant or a skin complaintā¦
Monica: If youād come and help once in a while, Jack, with the neighbourhood vegan herb garden for even an hour a week, Iād consider that borderline comment actually funny. Butā¦.
(Alyce left the group; ManU36 has joined)
Antoinette: Can I have dibs on the Community Trampoline for Roxyās mixed gender sixth birthday party next Saturday.
Monica: itās been used by the Intermediate Kundalini Yoga Co-operative til 11. Iāll check the neighbourhood spreadsheet for a slot after that.
Geoffrey: Hi again. My Eye in the Sky Drone Cam picked up 423 cars parked outside my drive (as below). We have to sort this out with Local Action. NOW!!

Jay-boy: Still dont know whod drink at The fā&&###in Duck
Monica: As group moderator, we do prescribe to accepted language, Rogerā¦and why call yourself Jay-boy? You sound like a 12 year old.
(Jay-boy has left the group, 0795553301 has joined)
Margot: my darling Tush is still up for grabs.
Jennie: Hi, Iāve just moved in to 39. Iāll help you out and walk Tush. Donāt mind, as I love dogs and, anyways, I will be putting out a kennel for my crossbreed pit bulls in the garden
Albert B. Hawkins from 105: what brainless cretin owns this? Itās slap bang in front of my drive

Harry3: Iām thinking of raising rabbits. Any advice????š°š°š°š°š°š°
@emms: Better boiled than than broiled
( 12 people have left the group)
Jan Oyebode
Made me laugh on this fine morning
Russell Hall
Hilarious……if it wasnāt so close to the truth š¤£
Sarah Boniface
As ever, subtle taste the Sir Howard watchword.
ED
An audible chuckle here in Minnesota at 5am
Will Travel
One of Sir Howardās best. Nice to see he can still poke one in the bleachers.
Kareem Haq
After attempting to understand this screed, I am now even more convinced that I will never engage with social media and that the 21st century is definitely not my scene.
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